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Thursday, February 26, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show in progress. Uncle Henry Show being taped. New tape machine, new tape involved as we have Lagniappe in the building with Rob Holbert and—Ashley, what is your name now?” said the Uncle. “It’s Ashley Trice now”, Ashley answered. “You have decided to shockingly take the last name of your husband?” said the Uncle. “Yes”, Ashley responded. “Trice, with a T”, she reminded our host. “I want to mention that your publication this week is news heavy”, said the Uncle. “Now Ashley, you reported on the Gulf Coast Classic”, said the Uncle. “They’re suppose to answer why these tickets are so expensive”, Ashley explained her report. “And for those—we had calls about Reggie Copeland in the last hour”, said the Uncle. “Reggie’s been such a bulldog about it (the Gulf Coast Classic). He wants to see checks”, said Rob. “The big story that blew my mind literally is the story you have, Rob Holbert, of Herman Thomas and all these allegations involving inmates”, said the Uncle. “Were you approached by the county?” he asked Rob. “By the end of listening to those two hours (of inmate audio recordings), I wanted to go home and lock my doors. I mean, it was a lot”, said Rob. “So the two attorneys that brought this up were former district attorneys”, the Uncle has learned. “He’s collected all this information over time”, Rob said about Joe Kulakowski. “And so this is—we have a series of very inflammatory allegations. You had the initial stuff where you had all the jail shopping”, said the Uncle. “Then you find out he’s been posting cases [for] other judges”, the Uncle continued. “Then we find out about the spanking allegations”, said the Uncle. “Taking them to spank them, taking them on vacation with him”, Rob mentioned. “You may not be able to answer this question, but I’ll ask it anyway”, said the Uncle. “What do you think of a judge taking someone out of jail”, the Uncle asked. “You would think the people would know—would notice this”, said Rob. “He’s Mobile’s only black judge and there was this attitude of him being a mentor to young black inmates”, said Rob. “He kept a just a strange amount of cars and his cars being pulled over at police road blocks”, Rob continued. “There are people I spoke with who couldn’t or wouldn’t go on the record”, said Rob. “I talked with numerous people, I talked with police officers”, Rob continued. “There are basically—Thomas operated with a ring”, said Rob. “There’s drug deals everywhere, there are police involved in it”, Rob continued. “I was told by police that cops were letting other people go”, said Rob. “There were certainly things going on that were strange”, according Rob. “I’ve got to say without a doubt that was [one of] the strangest thing[s]”, Rob concluded. “You would say how many—an estimate of how people that were talking about being paddled or abused?” the Uncle asked before receiving a “hundred” as an answer. “The people that were sexually abused or claiming to be sexually abused”, said Rob. “You had the attorneys, you had the different inmates”, said the Uncle, who also reminded listeners of “anonymous sources”. “I just want to establish that this is just not info from people in jail, this is coming from other people as well”, the Uncle explained himself before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. The Uncle Henry Show brought to you this hour by Hancock Bank”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Paul. Hello Paul”, he said to this hour’s first caller. “Boy, it’s a hard place to find a starting thread here. In the fraternity house you were talking about [him] having thousands of dollars on the table”, said Paul. “Are we talking about a elected official?” Paul asked. “I don’t know what he’s talking about here right now”, Rob responded. “The next just-jump-out question is Mike Marshall and the Press-Register, what’s his involvement in it?” said Paul. “You mention (in the Lagniappe article) these same tapes were played in the Press-Register”, said the Uncle. “Correct”, Rob responded. “There’s a lot of stuff they don’t do (at the Press-Register)”, according to ROB. “Well gosh, just keep up the good work. Thank you so much”, said Paul before leaving us. “Good morning, folks”, said Tim, who is also known as Sam Marston IV. “For those of us that didn’t know this was going on, it’s quite flattering. I think you would have to be naïve with the money on the table and the sexual things going on”, said Tim. “And the money on the table really amazes me. Are you guys going to publish any more stuff on this?” Tim asked. “Someone (‘Anderson’) filed a lawsuit against Judge Thomas 7 years ago”, said the Uncle. “About [being] paddled”, Rob completed our host’s sentence. “So this has been 7 years since all this stuff has been out there”, said Rob. “Are they going to have to put these people back in court?” Tim asked. “It could be a massive mess if he’s in fact indicted and convicted on these things. It could be a massive mess”, said Rob. “I just don’t see why it’s been taking place. It’s been two years since he’s resigned”, said Rob. “It seems clear to me that this stuff ought to be in court. I’m not saying the man is guilty, but it seems that this stuff ought to be in [writing]”, said Rob. “He says once the allegation of sex came up that the district attorney put the breaks on it”, said Rob in response to our host’s question. “We will take a quick commercial break”, said the Uncle before the break for news, which began just as our host was finishing his sentence.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Rob Holbert and Ashley Trice of Lagniappe are here”, said the Uncle. “Do you feel left out, Ashley, of the emphasis on Rob Holbert’s story?” the Uncle asked. “No”, Ashley answered. “Ashley plays a huge role in this”, said Rob. “You get so lost in something like this and she gets to play a role where she says, ‘You need to get this’ ”, Rob explained. “And also she will say, ‘I think this is brilliant’”, Rob added. “I want to say that it’s a great thing you’ve done to the city and the community”, said our next caller. “Now he brought up a U. S. attorney who [brought up] the case seven years ago”, said the Uncle after the caller left us. “We are in transition right now”, said Rob. “So the next U. S. attorney is possibly someone Judge Thomas had in his campaign?” said the Uncle. “I know that the feds are doing an investigation”, said Rob. “The FBI is doing an investigation”, the Uncle clarified. “The word supposedly is something’s going to happen within the next couple of weeks”, according to Rob. “It’s not really fair to Judge Thomas and the community to not do something about it”, said Rob. “Let’s talk to Chuck. Hello Chuck”, said the Uncle. “What about the state attorney?” Chuck asked. “Troy King hasn’t been interested in this”, Rob answered. “From what I understand, the attorney general’s office early on said the [subjects] haven’t been credible”, said Rob. “The attorney general has his own personal issues”, according to Rob. “There are several teenagers (inmates involved)”, Rob answered Chuck’s question. “One was supposedly 15”, said Rob. “Let’s talk to George. Hello George”, “I read that about the 15-year-old male (boy)”, said George. “I was quite amazed, this is an amazing story in my life”, said George. “What are you?” George asked Rob. “Lagniappe”, the Uncle answered for his guests. “What is your name?” George asked Rob. “Rob Holbert”, Rob answered. “You folks put the news out there. You can all run over the Press-Register”, said George before imitating John Tyson, Jr. saying “I fight crime” in a rough, but irritating tone of voice. “Now what’s your website?” the Uncle asked. “Lagniappemobile.com”, said Rob. “Again, the sources from your story are not just inmates or convicted criminals”, said the Uncle. “I want to stress again that you have multiple sources”, the Uncle continued. “I’m just reporting again what Joe (Kulakowski) did”, said Rob. “You co-operated and worked with numerous people and they were understandably nervous”, said the Uncle. “I just want to ask Rob is there’s a way if you’re late (delivering newspapers)”, Mary Ann asked. “Because of Mardi Gras”, said Rob. “Yeah, we were late, we were late getting them out”, Rob explained. “Has anyone received a notice of an Internal Revenue audit yet?” our next caller asked before laughing. “Unfortunately Lillian (Jackson) is not with us, she knew about the bank industry”, said the caller. “Everyone here in Mobile is connected all the way up to the capital”, said the caller. “We’re just privileged that we have a different set up around here”, he said before leaving us. After the break and a voice message, “You know anything about that?” the Uncle asked Ashley in response to a listener’s recorded message. “It was a municipal judge, I don’t know anything about that”, Ashley responded before the next caller. “Ron noted the story that you opened up a can a worms. You don’t know what else is going to come out of this. There are so many people in Mobile that are involved in this”, said our next caller, who mispronounced Rob’s name. “It hasn’t really been exposed yet to the full extent”, the caller continued. “You just stepped off, Henry, and Ron, good luck on this”, said the caller. “It’s Rob”, the Uncle said for correction. “It’s all right, I get this all the time”, said Rob. “Rob or Ron, do you feel like you just stepped in a giant pile of poo?” the Uncle asked. “Sometimes”, Rob answered before laughing. “I read that newspaper (Lagniappe) before, but it’s never any kind of real news story”, said our next caller. “I don’t know, Rob, about you doing any real news story”, said the caller before suggesting Herman Thomas for the Lagniappe staff. “I am detecting that a previous news story in Lagniappe irritated you”, according to the Uncle. “They just hired an editor for providing [these] news stories”, said the Uncle. “Do you do public interest stories? Is that what he said?” the Uncle asked after the caller left us. “If you only read us once a year, then you might miss something on a rainy day”, said Rob. “I don’t know what he’s talking about”, Rob admitted about the previous caller. “Let’s talk to Ron Wallace. Hello Ron Wallace”, said the Uncle, who emphasized the caller’s name. “What’s going on here?” Ron asked. “Just talking with the people from Lagniappe”, the Uncle answered. “Hello Ron”, said Ashley. “Look Ron, I’m up on a break, but thank you for the call. Ron Wallace, a former marine having his right to speak before the (Mobile city) council violated. Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break. After the final break for today, “The Herman Thomas story just dominates this issue of Lagniappe”, said the Uncle. “We had your story about the Gulf Coast Classic”, the Uncle reminded Ashley. “You see, you have all of this plus your regular features”, said the Uncle. “We have a profile on a lady who made a dress, a Mardi Gras gown completely made out of Crown Royal bags”, said Ashley. “You can comment on the story”, she later said. “We have a whole new website, you can comment on the story”, said Rob. “Thank you for informing us about this story. Remember to pray and read your Bible”, said the Uncle at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 7/10!

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “Ron Wallace has sent out some e-mails that he’s sent to the city council and your mayor, you can read Ron Wallace’s e-mails”, said the Uncle before directing listeners to the radio station’s World Wide Web site. “Now let’s find out—we’ve got some people waiting. Let’s talk to Ed. Hello Ed”, said the Uncle. “Last night I was watching WKRG news and they were showing a recap of the parade”, said Ed. “One of the KOR (Knights of Revelry) guys was spitting on camera”, said Ed, who “backed it up” with his video recording device to be sure of himself before changing it to “spitting on the camera”. “That is the weirdest thing I’ve heard so far”, said the Uncle. “I [sure] hope the city council lets Ron Wallace speak”, said Ed. “He may have just gotten out, I don’t know”, the Uncle responded. “Let’s talk to Chuck. Hello Chuck”, said the Uncle. “I want to speak about this Ron Wallace issue, too, and read his letter to the Press-Register”, said Chuck. “Under this role that they’ve got, it seems like it’s wide open for Ron Wallace to take legal action against the council”, according to Chuck. “Anytime you have an unwritten rule like that, it [is] open”, said the Uncle. “I have never read any unwritten rule by the council”, our host told Chuck. “I just can’t conceive of them not letting the man speak. In addition I have sent to you an e-mail concerning Richard Shelby”, said Chuck. “You don’t mind cancelling that e-mail?” Chuck asked. “I would appreciate it if you post that particular e-mail on your website so people can see on it”, Chuck later said. “Thank you, Chuck, for your phone call. Let’s find out now what in the world Trey Lane is up to”, said the Uncle before summon the show’s call screener with his theme music. “Is there anything I can do?” our host remembers the call screener’s substitute saying yesterday. “Did you go out to Joe Cain?” the Uncle asked Trey Lane. “I did not actually attend any parades. I watched them”, said Trey. “On Channel 5?” the Uncle asked in reference to WKRG-TV5 “This is odd for someone your age, so young”, said the Uncle. “Were you sick?” the Uncle asked with the belief that watching the parades on TV “is for the sick”. “No parades at your age, being an artistic musician!” the Uncle reacted. “So you’re now say you’re doing more paintings?” said the Uncle. “Did you actually get more money for the painting you sold?” the Uncle asked. “The topic of the painting that you sold will remain a topic I will not discuss”, said the Uncle, who believes the subject is “nasty”. “Now you say this is a musician, a radio personality, and now a painter”, said the Uncle in reference to Trey Lane’s job titles. “Now that is weird”, he reacted after the call screener typed his description of the new painting. “Is the person in the painting wearing clothing, of course not! Of course not!” said the Uncle. “I’m not talking about the quality of his painting”, the Uncle mentioned. “He knew the right people to get his painting”, he said before the next caller, whom he directed to “go to Google and type in Lagniappe Mobile”. “They have a new website and I can’t—the old website used to give you directions on where to find the (newspaper) boxes. Now on the new website, I can’t [seem] to find them”, the Uncle told his previous caller. “Rob Holbert will be here talking about this (Judge) Herman Thomas story and I must confess there is a lot in there that I don’t [like] to talk about”, said the Uncle. “The fetish part, there is a lot of that in the story that I’m just comfortable with ever talking about on the radio”, said the Uncle, who described the details as “adult”. “We’ve got the Norman theme”, said the Uncle as the frequent caller’s “tribute” music began all of a sudden. “Let’s talk to Norman. Hello Norman”, said the Uncle. “That’s [a] kind of different—that’s kind of different with your little recording there. It’s very—a little strange”, said Norman. “Did you watch any of the presidential address last night?” Norman asked our host. “Yes, I did!” the Uncle answered. “They’re like a bunch of teenagers”, Norman said about the members of the Congress of the USA. “They were in a state of ecstasy last night”, said the Uncle. “For eight years, they didn’t (work together)”, said Norman. “All this mess they’re going to wind up with—this country is headed for socialism”, according to Norman. “These people, these immigrants that come in here illegally, they deserve a job, they deserve healthcare—no they don’t!” said Norman in sarcastic and angry vocal tones. “And all this stuff with (Herman) Thomas, I don’t know what to make of that garbage”, said Norman before leaving us to the sounds of his “tribute” music. “Uncle Henry brought to you this hour by Hancock Bank”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials, beginning with an advertisement for Hancock Bank. After the break and a disgusting voice message, “I really am—this show has gotten too graphic. A lot of the callers have brought graphic descriptions to the show and it’s just not what I intended, that’s for you. Let’s talk to ‘The Top Cat’. Hello ‘Top Cat’ ”, said the Uncle. “You know these democrats, I say ‘democrats’, the people you see on TV nowadays, they’re just awful”, said “Top Cat”. “Let’s talk to Peter. Hello Peter, good morning”, said the Uncle. “I went down to that Mardi Gras yesterday with my family, just to one parade, I can’t stand more than one”, said Peter before bringing to our attention a collision of two automobiles. “Lo and behold there are city police from where it happened”, said Peter. “I’m shocked by it”, said the Uncle. “I’m shocked, too”, Peter responded. “He (a police officer) could have went and got that person. There was traffic everywhere”, said Peter. “I didn’t want to be involved in it”, Peter continued. “If you’re going to do a job, do a job”, said Peter. “And he had a bad attitude with me”, Peter described the police officer. “Thank you, Peter, for alerting us to this”, said the Uncle. “Who knows what the officer had to do before he got there?” the Uncle asked before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. A beautiful day, 61 degrees, fairly cloudy skies. Tomorrow the people from Lagniappe or least Rob Holbert [will be] here”, said the Uncle. “Earlier in the 7 o’clock hour [I] talked about the Ron Wallace situation. A former marine”, said the Uncle. “He has had a letter to the editor published in the Press-Register, and [he had] an editorial”, the Uncle continued. “Now we have Ron Wallace on the line. Good morning, Ron Wallace”, the Uncle concluded the introduction. “I’ve got the e-mail. You sent e-mails to Reggie Copeland, to Gina Gregory, and Mayor (Sam) Jones”, said the Uncle. “I’ve got an e-mail [response] from Gina Gregory”, said Ron. “I hope to get a call”, Ron added. “I would be a stickler once in office to the city council to stand up for business to make it a right to stand before the city council”, said Ron. “I’m sure more people will agree with you”, said the Uncle. “So you have a meeting tonight at the (Dauphin Island) Parkway library?” the Uncle asked. “We want people to bring their ideas”, said Ron after mentioning “the Checkers restaurant” near the library. “All right, Ron Wallace, keep me updated on what they tell you”, said the Uncle before the caller left us. “Eight year veteran of the United States Marine Corp, currently a Mobile police detective, now fighting to speak before the [Mobile] city council”, said the Uncle before the next caller. “I’m still wondering if anyone is ever going to get his birth certificate”, the caller admitted regarding the president of the USA. “I just hope that we get through these next four years without some kind of disaster”, said the caller before leaving us. “I’m surprised to that we’ve got more calls about renewed hopes in this country”, said the Uncle before reading a related news article. “So we have been given back the audacity to hope. I wonder if we have given back the hope to more phone calls today? Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and an angry voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Holly. Hello Holly, good morning”, said the Uncle. “How are you doing today?” Holly asked. “Good”, the Uncle answered. “I did not watch the entire (presidential) speech, I did not have the stamina”, said the Uncle. “Well, I didn’t have the stomach”, Holly responded. “It was nice having it on (the Mardi Gras parades) during the daytime”, said Holly in reference to WKRG-TV5. “I thought they did do a great job”, the Uncle said in agreement with Holly. “I hope everybody made it out safe and happy Ash Wednesday”, said Holly before leaving us. “Well praise the Lord, thank you Jesus, all”, said our next caller Bill after asking our host if he’s given up anything and prayed for his sins on this Ash Wednesday. “Now there are three or four big oil companies and they are a monopoly and they go out and refine oil”, said Bill after remembering 1989, since he said “20 years ago”. “From what you’re saying, you don’t feel any audacity of hope after watching that speech?” the Uncle asked. “Well, I’m all ready mad as hell about the cigarette prices going up”, said Bill. “I don’t know what to think anymore. I had hope to start with—they don’t know what hope to start with, they don’t know what to start with”, Bill continued. “Well, I’m shocked”, said the Uncle. “That’s what the Associated Press said (about hope)”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to ‘Miss Little Bit’. Hello ‘Miss Little Bit’ ”, said the Uncle. “I did have some encouragement for you today: there are some people going into foreclosure with their homes and that’s bad”, said “Miss Little Bit”. “Why are they building more subdivisions and that’s on Cottage Hill Road”, “Miss Little Bit” wondered before changing subjects. “Also, oxygen levels, you know there is so much carbon dioxide”, said “Miss Little Bit”. “Well, I enjoy plant life”, said the Uncle before “Miss Little Bit” left us. “I love paving, I love parking lots. I also love parking lots with trees, too”, said the Uncle. “After the final break for today and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “The media certainly excited and giddy over the new administration”, said the Uncle before playing an audio clip all of a sudden before having laughing forcefully in a mocking way. After playing the clip, “If Katie Couric can say that, if Brit Hume or Shepherd Smith at FOX News were to say that”, said the Uncle, torches would be lit. “Meanwhile stocks are falling, even though the president told us to be hopeful, the stocks are falling”, said the Uncle. “All right, Uncle Henry Show concluding. On the Uncle Henry page at NewsRadio710.com, you will find all those e-mails that Ron Wallace sent to city council meetings”, said the Uncle. “You can read more about it (a meeting at the Panera Bread in Mobile) and they even have their own website”, said the Uncle. “Tomorrow, Rob Holbert from Lagniappe will be here to talk about that utterly, amazing story about the Judge (Herman) Thomas”, the Uncle reminded listeners. “Remember to pray, pray for others and read that Bible for instruction”, he also reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 6/10!

Monday, February 23, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Now K. P., I did not encourage you to drink before going to the pregnancy classes—the childbirth classes with your wife. Maybe I need to make myself more clearly”, said the Uncle. “Instead I told you to write down the Bible verses what Jesus has done for me”, the Uncle explained. “I am not encouraging anyone to liquor up for whatever reason”, the Uncle reminded listeners. “Let me tell you this, K. P.”, said the Uncle, who suggested “wait until you’re actually a parent” before “liquoring up”. “All right, let’s go back to the phones. (251) 479-2723 is the number and Julius is on the line”, said the Uncle. “Your cell phone is breaking up here”, he told Julius before making sure he understood what the caller was saying. “Look, I am going to continue to play the daily Reagan. You know the Reagan haters want to call in and cast dispersions on President Reagan”, the Uncle told Julius. “And you listen to people everyday on talk radio calling in speculating [on] things what’s going to happen under this (current) president”, said Julius. “All you hear is pure speculation”, according to Julius. “I just wish the man the best and all of this country”, he said in reference to the president of the USA. “I do want America to prosper and I truly wish all of his insane policies come to work”, said the Uncle. “That’s all I have to say, thank you”, said Julius before leaving us. “You know the president has a lot of ideas that philosophically I disapprove of”, said the Uncle. “If America does prosper under the tax and spend plan, [then] it will be a miracle”, according to the Uncle. “None of this gets any coverage under the Julius story line, where you can have some stability—some stability in Iraq”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Bobby. “Just say a few quick things that I want to touch upon before I move on”, said Bobby. “I have to stand clear of anything Sean Penn is in”, said Bobby for political reasons. “I have never heard of anything in my lifetime of a nation being taxed into prosperity”, according to Bobby. “Thank you, Bobby. We got word yesterday that the upcoming budget from the president will call for a raise in the capital gains tax”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Michael. Hello Michael”, he said to the next caller. “He’s sitting out here and bailing out the wrong people, Uncle Henry”, Michael believes about the president. “Our government encouraged lenders to lend them some money”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Chad. Hello Chad”, he said to the next caller. “I just had to call in and fill in a little bit of rebuttal to Julius”, said Chad. “Well, once again these people have no basis of reality in fact. Tax revenue increased under Ronald Reagan”, said Chad. “Our deficit did not rise to this level because of tax cuts, it rose because of [undermining] spending”, according to Chad. “It wasn’t cutting taxes, which, by the way, always increases revenue for the government, it rises up”, said Chad. “Read something for a change”, Chad said angrily before leaving us. “All right, Chad. Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and a sarcastic voice message, “Thank you, for that. We had a call Friday from Freddie complaining that he’s getting text messaging—that he’s getting unsolicited text messages”, said the Uncle, who responded to the listener’s recorded message. “Let’s talk to Bill. Hello Bill”, he said to the next caller. “My question to him (the president) is this: maybe it’s 15 to 20 percent of the people in the United States who smoke cigarettes”, said Bill. “They’re not going to vote for him in four years”, Bill predicts. “So it looks to me that he shot himself in the foot politically by raising the taxes so high for cigarettes”, according to Bill. “I just think he made a stupid mistake with these taxes. What do you think, Henry?” said Bill. “I think a lot of voters are going to vote for him anyway because they love him so much”, the Uncle answered. “The last time I quit (smoking), I promised my body”, said Bill. “I’ve run out of time, Henry, and I’ll talk to you later”, said Bill before leaving us. “We go from [that] Bill to another Bill. Hello Bill”, said the Uncle. “I hate to move your call early, Bill”, said the Uncle near the end of the segment. “I think the mortgage thing will be more important than any other thing they do”, he said before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. (251) 479-2723 is the number. Let’s talk to Steve. Hello Steve”, said the Uncle. “I’m just getting over a little head cold”, said Steve. “Didn’t have to go to the doctor or anything”, Steve added. “One thing you’re going to have to keep in mind here: you’ve got the whole Bush administration from day one—from before day one, really, the whole press” was against him, said Steve. “Seventy five or eighty percent in the tank for this (current) president”, Steve guessed. “You know you have to (ugh)—you have to have a historical perspective to look at these things”, Steve suggested. “I don’t know, it seems like, if you’ve hated this country for the last eight years, you’re happy right now”, said Steve, who said the opposite for folks who have loved their country since birth. “I have peaked into the e-mail box [early] this morning”, said the Uncle as a mechanical sound effect plays. “The e-mail from Linda reads as follows: ‘Hi Uncle Henry, I listen to you every morning. There was a man last week who said he wants to lead with likeminded people’ ”, said the Uncle, who later read the common mispronunciation (“Schillinger’s”) of Schillinger Road in Mobile. “So Linda’s husband leads, gathering up a group of men at Panera Bread, Monday night at 7 o’clock to discuss the country’s problems”, the Uncle has learned. “They want it to be peaceful”, the Uncle reminded listeners. “Let me tell you this, it’s only February 23 and look at our way”, said the Uncle in reference to the current presidency in the USA. “Look at the unbelievable left turn we have taken”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Carl. Hello Carl”, he said to the next caller. “I am calling if anyone has heard of the ‘Right Feeling Wrong’ show on HBO”, said Carl. “No”, the Uncle answered. “You will see people praying and a lot of angry republicans”, said Carl. “It’s definitely eye opening. I’m not a believer. I don’t know any other people who are a believer, but it kind of pokes fun of other religious beliefs”, Carl continues. “I have very conservative beliefs, very political beliefs and I think everybody needs to see this”, according to Carl. “Do you think the intent was to find morons at these rallies”, the Uncle asked based on Carl’s description. “One guy finally does (say a vulgar word for a black person)”, Carl remembers without saying the word. “If you haven’t heard about it, I thought that I may put it out there for you and your listeners”, said Carl. “Video on demand nowadays, that really is an easy thing to do”, Carl suggested before leaving us. “God bless you. Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Judy. Hello Judy”, said the Uncle. “Hello there. How are you doing?” said Judy. “About the woman that called in about the meeting, is this for men [only] or women coming?” said Judy. “It has to include women”, said the Uncle. “Well, it says her husband and a few other guys”, he remembers from the message. “It says we invite anybody who wants to come, so that includes women”, said the Uncle. “Why thank you”, said Judy before leaving us. “I will have the e-mail up on NewsRadio710.com for [anybody] who wants to review it”, said the Uncle. “Hello Doctor—excuse me, Uncle Henry”, said our next caller. “Bottom line, I think this economic crisis is contrived to get a certain [amount] to society” to get the current president in the White House, said the caller. “I don’t think he wants to stop it. All we’ve heard is him saying [is] fear, destruction”, said the Uncle. “It’s just one big shotgun deal”, said the Uncle. After citing poll results in the Press-Register, “Thirty days into his presidency he’s all ready the worse president we’ve ever had and I’ll drop off on that”, said the caller before leaving us, all though our host does not remember the poll. “I saw your letter to the editor in the Press-Register”, the Uncle told the next caller Ron Wallace “So what is the latest, Ron Wallace?” the Uncle asked before learning of a rally at the Mobile Public Library Parkway Branch. “Once I’m in office in the city council as did the City of Mobile I will push for that motion where it’s the citizen’s right to [speak] before the council”, said Ron. “Like I said before, I am not a certified candidate at this point until we get this [turn] in the city budget”, Ron added. “I think we need to be transparent as a city council when it comes to our reserve”, said Ron. “Thank you, Ron Wallace. Uncle Henry Show, our concluding moments are next”, said the Uncle before the break. After the final break for today, music from the TV program “Jonny Quest” was used as bumper music as a voice message played. “Thank you for listening to the show. We have ‘Ask the Expert’ coming up next after the news—the news is next, then ‘Ask the Expert’ ”, said the Uncle. “So I’m going to make the leap that birds are going to be discussed”, our host predicts for “Ask the Expert” before informing listeners he will be live on the radio tomorrow for Fat Tuesday, or Mardi Gras. “I have to be alive from 6:00 to 8:00”, said the Uncle, who will have “the Best of Uncle Henry” for the 8 o'clock hour, followed by a repeat of “Rush's Week in Review”.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 7/10!

“The Home Stretch” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Friday, February 20, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Bill, I enjoy your observations from different locations. I don’t have a budget in this economy. If I had a budget, I would pay you”, said the Uncle, who was responding to a listener’s voice message. “Uncle Henry Show underway in this half-hour. (251) 479-2723 is the number”, the Uncle reminded listeners before informing or warning listeners of “another composition by ‘Neocon Ron’ ”. “I have received e-mails of glee from someone in our building here that is delighted that muzak is out of business”, said the Uncle, who dislikes that sort of attitude. “I don’t think I hear anymore muzak”, according to the Uncle. “I go into Big Lots and I’m in there looking at the weird off brand dog food and they’re in there playing Sheryl Crow”, said the Uncle. “Just awful”, he described the store’s music by singers he’s unfamiliar with, along with “just irritating”. “Let’s talk—so yeah, I’d rather have muzak—to the person in the building”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Gwen. Hello Gwen, good morning”, said the Uncle. “I am feeling I have been apathetic for too long and that is not paying attention to what’s going on in this country”, said Gwen. “So I’m calling in to ask you what you think of the top three things”, Gwen requested for apathy. “Do you live in the City of Mobile?” the Uncle asked. “I’m in West Mobile living in the county”, Gwen answered. “I know this is going to be very difficult and very difficult for you, but you need to pay attention to the news”, said the Uncle, who suggested local TV news and the Press-Register. “You do have a sense of right and wrong”, the Uncle asked before realizing the caller does. “But we don’t allow the news in the house”, said Gwen. “I just don’t like my programs [] the news”, said Gwen. “Your child can lose their innocence watching the news”, said the Uncle. “It’s just inappropriate”, Gwen responded before our host directed her to Alabama Live, or Al.com. “You need to make the extra extraordinary effort of contacting the politician”, the Uncle suggested by using the telephone. “Or making the extreme effort of writing a letter. You see, writing a letter [now] is rare”, the Uncle added. “If you agree with them, as President Reagan said on yesterday’s show”, said the Uncle, who was referring to an audio clip. “And the third and extra step that is even more extraordinary and takes more of your time is to pursue your fellow citizen”, the Uncle suggested. “Writing a letter to the editor or calling the notorious ‘Sign Off’ line”, the Uncle continued. “All right, I’m writing this down. This is my new year’s resolution in February”, said Gwen before leaving us with laughter. “Let’s talk to Martha”, said the Uncle. “I think we can have a camera. You know, the highway patrol have a camera on their dashboard, you know, to record what happens”, said Martha. “That sounds complicated, but I like the idea. I don’t know if I’m technically up to speed to have a camera”, the Uncle responded. “You would have your camera to prove there”, said Martha. “If you would get more details on that like costs, then I’ll spread the news”, said the Uncle. “Thank you, Uncle Henry”, said Martha before leaving us. “Let me tell you, I don’t know if any of this can make heads and tails on this. You know technology is so advance it’s like waving a magic wand”, said the Uncle. “I agree with that previous caller on the camera”, said our next caller Franklin before making a suggestion. “The time for the (traffic) light to be on—on yellow to be four (more) seconds and make all the lights every where—these times the same. That will go along with solving” the red light issue, said Franklin. “You’re saying add four extra seconds?” the Uncle asked. “Four extra seconds”, Franklin confirmed. “To a young person like Trey Lane, four seconds is an eternity”, said the Uncle in reference to the show’s call screener. “Well Franklin, you and I may be the last generation of mortgage owners in this country”, said the Uncle, who predicts Trey Lane will be the next generation of home renters. “Thank you, Franklin, I have to run for the break. Uncle Henry Show continues”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “That may work: a bunch of high school children having to go in a room with George with a machine gun” hearing about the Alabama Constitution, said the Uncle. “Don’t you dare tell your child anything about God making it rain” and striking a puppy with lighting, he told the voice message caller. “I was told—when I was a little child about four years old, we lived near some cousins”, said the Uncle, who said one of the cousins said “thunder is the sound of the devil beating its wife with a frying pan and the mental imagery just stayed with me for the rest of my life”. “You know that is something I can live without”, said the Uncle. “Whenever you are talking about God to a little kid, make sure that is biblically based because their idea of God will stick with them for the rest of their life”, the Uncle concluded. “Do you do your own background music?” our next caller Chuck asked. “Yes”, the Uncle answered. “Do you remember the old program that used to be on ‘Victory At Sea’?” Chuck asked our host, who remembers. “Hey Chuck, how are you doing?” our second caller named Chuck asked. “Doing good, sir”, the Uncle responded. “Let’s talk to David. Hello David”, said the Uncle. “I have an interesting proposal for the new government”, said David. “If they’re so eager to have all these government programs”, said David, who suggested that the federal government “sends them all $2000”. “Obviously if people think this is a good idea, they ought to fund it”, said David. “I agree with you, you’re absolutely right, people are generous with other people’s money, but not their own”, said the Uncle immediately before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Jeanine. Hello Jeannine”, said the Uncle. “I’ve been listening to your show for probably close to six to eight months”, said Jeanine. “I do appreciate how you bring things out in your show, but I’m calling in with a public service announcement”, said Jeanine before explaining her organization. “We are able to get in the public schools and have a good news club for the children”, said Jeanine. “It’s more or less an effort to make the public aware of this effort here in southwest Alabama. We are [currently in nine] schools here in Mobile County”, Jeanine continued. “And what is the date on this again?” the Uncle asked. “March 21st”, Jeannie answered. “And do you have access to e-mail?” the Uncle asked. “They have an office number”, Jeannine responded before leaving us. “There is a new song by ‘Neocon Ron’ on all this federal spending”, said the Uncle before informing and warning listeners of “an introductionary commentary by ‘Neocon Ron” at the beginning of the voice message. “And now I understand that Trey Lane is making money from artwork that he’s painted. Is this true”, said the Uncle. “That is unbelievable, that is unbelievable”, the Uncle reacted. “That’s what I said”, Trey responded. “You should put that (painting) on the Uncle Henry page”, Trey suggested after our host refused to describe the painting after feeling uncomfortable. “Trey Lane, stand by, I want your instant analysis on the instant spending song”, said the Uncle. “Ok”, Trey responded before the song began to play. After the song, “All right, Trey Lane, as a musician, professionally”, said the Uncle. “Also a paid painter, artistic painter, what is your [complaint] on the ‘Neocon Ron’ spending song?” the Uncle asked. “I think that I enjoyed that (commentary) so much that the song was sort of an anti-climax”, said Trey. “I’m just amazed again by his lyrical ability”, said the Uncle. “I would like to see ‘Neocon Ron’ in charge of a PBS show”, said Trey. “He’s amazing, he’s an amazing fellow”, Trey added. “When I think PBS, I think National Public Radio”, said the Uncle. “He’s that sharp, he’s that brilliance that they won’t probably realize”, according to Trey before returning to his work post to the sounds of his theme music. Before taking a break for commercials, “A brand new entry in the music field”, the Uncle announced along with “a new listener” with a “tribute to a regular caller”. After the break and a voice message, “All right, one more time here, Trey Lane, the musical expert, a rare instance where I’ll pull him in (again) for a song”, said the Uncle as the call screener’s theme music plays again. “Someone has put together a song, spending hours putting together a song”, said the Uncle. “It is a tribute—the man that has sent this to me is Tommy V. He has put together a tribute to a regular caller on this show”, said the Uncle. “Who is it?” Trey asked. “I want you to give me an evaluation of this tribute”, said the Uncle before playing the weird song recorded in an MP3 file and sent by electronic mail. “All right, that was the tribute to Norman, there. Now Trey Lane, that sounded right down your alley”, said the Uncle. “It really captured the essence of Norman”, said Trey. “Are you shocked as I am that someone was out there recording Norman calls”, the Uncle asked. “That should be the official Norman theme when he calls”, Trey suggested. “I’m shocked and surprised that Norman has been singled out”, said the Uncle. “He sort of stands out among the regular Uncle Henry callers”, said Trey. “This has been a mind-blowing thing to receive on a Friday morning”, said the Uncle. “Trey Lane, are you—you told me you were going to do Joe Cane Day for the first time in years. Is that still [in your] plans?” said the Uncle. “Yes”, Trey answered. “I am definitely working Monday and I’m willing to be here”, said the Uncle. “I may do a best of compilation for that show (on Fat Tuesday)”, said the Uncle. “I may do live reports”, said Trey. “If you’re not here, I want a voice mail on your Joe Cain experience”, our host requested from the caller. “Uncle Henry Show concludes here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle before the break. After the final break for today, “Uncle Henry Show concluding. [With that] ‘Ask the Expert’ next here on NewsRadio710”, said the Uncle. “We have a brand new line-up here on the weekend. We have some great conservative talk, you might want to check that out. Remember to pray and read that Bible”, he said at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 7/10!

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“It is 9:06, six minutes after 9:00 at NewsRadio 710. The Uncle Henry Show as the Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle. “I’m just confused”, the Uncle admitted after hearing a listener’s ridiculous voice message. “We were all mourning over the death of ‘Tuffy’ your blind rooster”, the Uncle reminded the caller. “All right the phone lines are activating. Let’s talk to George. Hello George”, he said before the caller spoke. “I’m really enjoying your show this morning. I’m just simply interested in what the councilman and the sheriff—Reggie Copeland, had to say”, said George, whose machine gun sound effects played in the background. “I never heard of a political candidate being allowed time to discuss such critical issues and—discuss things like that. It’s usually business of what Reggie had to say”, said George. “I guess a true recipe for failure is try to make everyone happy. You’re not going to do it”, according to George. “Do you realize how much time that would take up, they only need some short time, really”, said George. “I have to stand by what Reggie Copeland had to say, that has been the rules for years and years”, George continued. “That’s all I had to say. Thank you so much”, George concluded. “Let’s talk to Jenny. Hello Jenny, good morning”, said the Uncle. “I just want to thank you for this program. I have only been listening for a few months, but it’s a wonderful window of our thoughts and our opinion”, said Jenny. “You have some many wonderful callers and also some dumb ones”, Jenny continued. Without ever identifying the president of the USA, “I know that when he stroke that pen on that stimulus pen this afternoon, it [has] absolutely changed the face of our nation. I believe that he is spitting in the face of our forefathers. Also, he is spitting in the face of God”, said Jenny. “I do a lot of cooking by the way and I read lots of different types of recipes”, said Jenny before sharing what he told her children: “Because Jesus lived, I can face tomorrow, because He lives off of the adornment. I know that He holds the picture and life before living is just because Jesus lived. And I thank you for this program and the opportunity to speak of my faith and for the validity of your work everyday”. “And I start off my day with you. Thank you”, said Jenny before leaving us. “I guess I’m going to have a celebrity atheist of the day and a celebrity secularist of the day”, the Uncle suggested for himself, along with some “Ozzy Osbourne music”. “As far as your time capsule, I would put Rush Limbaugh’s two books in there”, our next caller suggested. “I’m wondering how many more times this year alone we will rush to do something, we will hurry to do something without considering it?” the Uncle asked. “Let’s see—once again, Ron Wallace. Hello Ron”, said the Uncle. “All right, so—so you’d like to have all (the city council rules) in writing so you can see it in writing”, the Uncle said for himself. “Why has it after all these years they haven’t put in the rules with the rest of the rules?” Ron asked. “Ron Wallace, I appreciate your phone call and again if you want to speak before the city council”, said the Uncle before suggesting, “You need to apply for zoning, some type of zoning change or a liquor license”. “Thank you, Ron Wallace. The Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Telephone number is (251) 479-2723. Let’s talk to Ben. Hello Ben”, said the Uncle. “I’m interested in your conversation this morning”, said Ben. “Once again they’re putting a correction to their error”, Ben mentioned about the Press-Register before admitting why he called. “There’s no (city council) rule and that’s obvious to everybody”, said Ben. “I just want to let you know there is no rule, they are just operating arbitrarily”, said Ben, who is “just disappointed in Reggie Copeland”. “I need people to pressure Clinton Johnson and Reggie Copeland”, Ben suggested. “A time limit be placed on the city council person as well as the speaker, that is outstanding”, said the Uncle. “It follows the whatever the goose is good for the gander principle”, he said before speaking to caller Bill. “I don’t understand it. You were very upset about ‘Tuffy’ the blind rooster”, said the Uncle as he brought to the caller’s attention the fried chicken he eats. “All of my chickens are pets. I have 26 about now and they proliferate”, said Bill. “I don’t slaughter them for—you know, eating purposes”, Bill continued. “I eat my chicken from Wal-Mart”, said Bill. “I’m mostly involved and pray over my chickens, my dog, my wife”, Bill continued. “I eat chicken all my life, but I would never harm one of my chickens”, said Bill. “I know you have dogs, but do you eat one of your dogs?” the Uncle asked. “Don’t get crazy with me, Uncle Henry”, Bill responded. “Nobody eats dogs, I don’t know anyone who eats dogs”, said Bill. “You never know what you might have to do (after a nuclear blast). Eat one of my chickens”, Bill supposed. “I would never consider anything like that”, said Bill. “I’m amazed at the devotion you have for your pet chickens”, said the Uncle. “I originally raised quail, but I stopped doing that”, said Bill. “I used to hunt animals”, Bill admitted. “I think I was watching C-SPAN”, Bill seemed to remember. “Do you watch C-SPAN?” Bill asked. “Only in cases of emergency”, the Uncle answered. “The numbers are like $700 or $800 billion dollars, but they gave each tax payer, they divided up the money”, said Bill. “The overarching goal here is to spread the wealth to people who don’t pay taxes”, said the Uncle. “Why should anybody receive any aid and you’ve never worked or never paid any taxes”, Bill asked. “That sounds like temporary food stamps”, according to Bill. “The way of life is working for a living”, said Bill. “I don’t know anybody who wants to be called a bum”, said Bill. “Of course now, I’m retired”, Bill mentioned. “I hope everything works out. Have a nice day”, Bill concluded before leaving us. “He has pet chickens. Never eats pet chicken, but would never eat dog”, said the Uncle before the next caller. “The reason we’ve got the situation here in Mobile is because of the super majority rule”, said our next caller before mentioning “those three commissioners” and “gerrymandering”. “Hey with that, I’ve got to run”, the Uncle told the caller before quickly taking a break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Steve. Hello Steve”, said the Uncle. “I understand it now that it’s easier to get on welfare now. The thing is when the law is signed”, said Steve. “Well the states had to get their own welfare reform once”, said the Uncle. “We went from five million families to two million families on welfare”, the Uncle remembered from the 1990s. “That’s just great, you know that’s important stuff, Henry”, said Steve. “You know I’m with you on the whole burying thing, burying stuff”, said Steve. “I’d rather go to my toilet, tear up my money and flush it down the toilet”, said Steve. “You’re a self-employed man, so I don’t guess you’ll be getting your thirteen dollars a week”, said the Uncle. “He can keep his thirteen dollars, just give me back my country”, said Steve, who did not identify the person he referred to. “He’s not done with it yet”, the Uncle responded. “I’m just tired of the lazy dictating to the none lazy”, said Steve. “We do it by going to work, man”, said Steve. “I don’t know, it’s getting really—it’s getting really strange out there. Personally, I’m doing ok, I’m not falling into the abyss”, said Steve. “They’re saying it because they want to make that happen, that there’s going to be the next Great Depression”, said Steve before call screener Trey Lane’s theme music began to play from low volume to high volume. “Steve, I agree. Thank you for the phone call. I’ve got to run”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to a non-partisan figure, Trey Lane, who does not participate in the political”, the Uncle announced. “Because if the fairness doctrine is re-instituted, we’re going to have to transform the Uncle Henry Show into an arts and variety show”, according to the Uncle before mentioning a listener’s poem sent by voice message. “It’s entitled ‘Waffle House Woman’”, said the Uncle before playing the ridiculous poem recording. “All right, Trey Lane, you’ve been a songwriter and worked with people in verse, what do you think?” said the Uncle. “It’s ok. It’s not—what you call, ‘Neocon Ron’ ”, said Trey, who was referring to a frequent voice message caller. “You know the Waffle House jukebox has a wife selection of songs by the Waffle House”, Trey mentioned. “I think he’s written about my world “, our host said about the poet. “I enjoy Waffle House, I admire Waffle House women”, said the Uncle. “I just enjoy it”, the Uncle continued. “I would like to see the video”, Trey suggested. “I would have to write my poetry myself [before] the fairness doctrine”, said the Uncle. “I enjoy that very much. I’ve always admired Waffle House women and now they have to put up with something I’ve never [heard of]”, said the Uncle. “I wonder if he’s in fact registered as a candidate yet?” our next caller asked in reference to Ron Wallace. “I’ve never run for office anywhere, so I don’t know”, the Uncle answered. “I wish he can call in and specify. We thank you, Uncle Henry”, said the caller before leaving us. “The Uncle Henry Show continues”, the Uncle reminded listeners before the break. After the break and an angry voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues and L. D., I hope you are listening, I did some research on that and it’s not true”, said the Uncle, who was responding to the listener’s recorded message. “I will give you a brief run-down on that (debunking)”, he said before describing a news article. “Let’s see, other story—I received a—I received a story from Trey Lane. Trey Lane forwarded me a story about the Jackson family”, said the Uncle. “I enjoyed the Jackson 5 when they were children before they were corrupted by disco and you [all] what happened to Michael”, said the Uncle. “And it has nothing to do with Michael. It has something to do with Marlon Jackson”, he said before reading the news article from the British Broadcasting Corporation, or “the BBC”, as our host called it. “A slave history theme park, that has got to be the weirdest idea for a theme park that I’ve ever heard”, said the Uncle, who also mentioned “the Jackson 5 museum”. “It just doesn’t sound like a nice vacation”, according to the Uncle. “And I will be following that story with great interest. Thank you, Trey Lane”, said the Uncle before the break. After the final break for today, “Uncle Henry Show concludes here on NewsRadio 710. Out of time for today’s show. Thank you for listening”, said the Uncle before reminding listeners to send voice messages by dialing (251) 706-2855 or 706-BULL. “Thank you for listening. Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re in doubt of what to do, read your Bible”, he reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 5/10!

Note of Interest:

Folks, due to the political nature of the 9 o'clock hour for Wednesday's show, this writer will not summarizing that portion of the show. Good day!

Monday, February 16, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“The Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. A lovely Monday morning. The telephone number if you want to call in here [as] the listener is (251) 479-2723”, said the Uncle. “The telephone number set up by Harbor Communications is 1-888-360-WNTM”, the Uncle continued. “Let’s talk to Chad. Hello Chad”, he said to the first caller this hour. “Did you have a good weekend?” Chad asked. “Why thank you. Yes, it [was]”, the Uncle responded. “Let’s talk to Johnny. Hello Johnny. Good morning”, said the Uncle. “I heard that lady questioning the intellect of our president there”, said Johnny. “Do we judge him about the people he associates with or that he’s naïve”, Johnny wondered. “Remember that nobody is perfect according to the press secretary. Nobody is perfect, just an honest mistake”, the Uncle responded before the blaring alarm sound effect of “The Freddie Alert System” was used in anticipation of a frequent caller. “And I want to say a special hello to any accidental listener. I just found out from Freddie that we have had an accidental listener”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Vaughn. Hello Vaughn”, he said to the next caller. “You just push a button and it pulls you through (the radio dial)”, said Vaughn before changing the subject very quickly. After Vaughn left us, “I don’t think we will ever know what each leg of the stool (metaphor for stimulus legislation) is unless we sit on it”, the Uncle responded. “Uncle Henry Show continues”, he said before the break for commercials. After the break and a silly voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Telephone number is 479-2723, that’s 479-2723. Let’s talk to Ron Wallace. Hello Ron Wallace”, said the Uncle. “I read about you in the newspaper today, Ron Wallace”, the Uncle mentioned. “Are they going to let you speak to the city council now, Ron Wallace?” the Uncle asked. “Not from where we are”, Ron answered. “Sounds like your rights are being violated”, said the Uncle. “All right, so you’re looking to put the rule in writing that prevents candidates from speaking to the city council”, the Uncle said for himself “I think you’re in the right, you should be allowed to speak, just because you’re running for office doesn’t mean you’re not a citizen anymore”, said the Uncle. “I’m not trying to fight the council or anything, but I believe in what is right”, said Ron before leaving us. “It is a privilege. That is a—looks like there is unwritten rules about who should talk”, said the Uncle. “They got tired of Lillian Jackson and other concerned citizens speaking at the meeting”, the Uncle continued “What could a candidate say for five minutes at a city council meeting that would sway (voters)”, the Uncle asked. “I hope this can be resolved one way or the other”, said the Uncle. “I didn’t get to hear your whole speech concerning Mr. Wallace”, said our next caller. “This was in the newspaper today that says he signed up to speak but he got a call from the city council president”, said the Uncle. “The council has always stopped candidates from speaking to them”, the Uncle read from a quotation of a city council clerk. “He’s still a city citizen of Mobile, is he not?” the caller asked. “Without causing any confusion, I think the city council needs to go back and look—hey, we’re put into office for the people by the people”, the caller suggested before leaving us, followed by another caller. “All right, what does that mean, Trey—Lane? That was odd. Was that a prediction of mosquitoes?” said the Uncle after the caller. “I don’t know what to make of it if there is going to be a problem with rampant mosquitoes or not. We’ve had more cold snaps this year”, said the Uncle. “Chad, I did get the e-mail. It will probably be after the show so I can watch the video”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“I talked about government grants last week and I was looking at Trey Lane”, said the Uncle. “So that (leased-access) TV show you’re doing now. What night is that on? Tuesday night. Remind me to promote that. Is there nothing nasty on it?” said the Uncle. “The government wants to promote TV shows on the arts. Thank you, federal government and that was before the stimulus”, according to the Uncle. “Another reason to lose weight is that you may have head aches”, the Uncle has learned after announcing more “overbesity news”. “And there’s a story out about Winston Churchill’s head. The British are very concerned about Winston Churchill’s head”, the Uncle announced before explaining. “It’s a bronze bush of Sir Winston Churchill weighing hundreds of pounds”, said the Uncle. “He said I don’t want this. Thank you very much, please take it back”, he read about the president of the USA. “Now that the bust of Winston Churchill has been sent back, they are very nervous about this”, the Uncle continued. “The president has replaced the bust of Winston Churchill with a bust of Abraham Lincoln in his office”, the Uncle concluded before the break for commercials. After the break and a vulgar voice message, “All right, that was—maybe we can condense that down to a bumper sticker or something. Uncle Henry Show here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “Let me quickly put a quick question here for the call screener, a young person”, said the Uncle as he summoned Trey Lane with his theme music. “Did you participate in any Mardi Gras parade”, the Uncle asked. “I am holding down for Mardi Gras Day (Fat Tuesday) so that I can eat some [raccoon] with Freddie”, said Trey. “Is Mardi Gras the day before Joe Cain Day”, Trey asked. “Wouldn’t that be a wonderful thing on Monday to hear Trey’s report on Joe Cain Day?” the Uncle asked his audience. “Wouldn’t you be in that day?” the Uncle asked the call screener, “All right, he might not be here”. “I don’t recognize who this is, but it’s real. Here it is, giving a report on a Mardi Gras ball”, said the Uncle before playing a listener’s voice message. “Do you recognize who this is?” he asked as the ridiculous voice message played. “Did he say ‘buf-fet table’?” the Uncle asked. “Doesn’t sound like anything that I enjoy”, said the Uncle. “Sir, you’re like this all the time?” the Uncle asked about the caller’s critiquing. “If you’re going to report on any further Mardi Gras activities, you could edit yourself a little bit”, the Uncle suggested. “I am flattered by that because I will never go to any of those events”, the Uncle told the caller named Reginald. “To me going out to have a good time is what I did over the weekend”, said the Uncle. “As long as you cover up the appropriate parts of your body, so there were no worries on that part”, he remembers about his weekend event. “They’re all after dark, except for one”, he said about “Mardi Gras balls”. “Just very difficult for me to participate in something like that”, the Uncle concluded before the break. After the final break for today and a sarcastic voice message, “Yeah, I thought the—with the new administration up in Washington there would be less of these grand juries in Montgomery”, said the Uncle in response to the recorded message. “This Chicago stuff is—there’s going to have to be an opera about it. Let’s talk to Ed. Hello Ed”, said the Uncle. “What you’re going to do with it? Are you going to get ten dollars more when you get your paycheck?” said Ed. “Thirteen dollars a week is not a lot of money to some people”, according to Ed. “If we’re going to spend this kind of money, put it back in the pockets of Americans”, said Ed in reference to stimulus legislation. “They don’t really want to stimulate the economy. It’s called spreading the wealth”, said the Uncle. “It’s probably going to turn worse”, Ed concluded. “Yes, this is going to be the biggest expenditure, one year expenditure in history”, said the Uncle after reading a message from Trey Lane. “Especially after that newspaper on Friday, we have a right to TV”, the Uncle remembered. “Remember to pray, pray for others, and when you’re in doubt of what do, you will find all the answers within the pages of your Bible”, he reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 6/10!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“Well shame on FOX News, shame, shame, shame. If I had taken that story about the you-know-what (prophylactics) in New York”, said the Uncle, who believes his papa “would have decked me. I would have just—he would have just knocked me out if had used that language around my father”. “There might been children at home suspended for chewing gum—I’m not pleased with that (report)”, said the Uncle after presuming his audience includes children “being forced to listen” while taking the day off from school. “Thank goodness the FOX News is not part of the ‘podcast’”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Jane—Jane has been waiting. Hello Jane”, he said to this hour’s first caller. “If you don’t have enough room in your yard, you can always do hand gardening”, said Jane. “When they built this house in 2001, it’s a retirement home”, said Jane, who found a part of the house’s yard to grow vegetables. “I would love to see a young couple get together with the older couple and get involved with the physical labor”, said Jane. “Tim (Sam Marston IV) would love to do that”, the Uncle responded. “That just sounds right down Tim’s ally, helping elderly with the gardening and sharing the bounty. Let’s talk to Jim. Hello Jim”, said the Uncle. “What was that FOX News commercial? The FOX News commercial?” Jim asked. “Do you agree that the FOX News was nasty and terrible?” the Uncle asked. “That was terrible and I was appalled”, Jim answered. “Last night I was flipping the television channels and David Letterman was on”, said Jim, who normally doesn’t watch “The Late Show with David Letterman”. “A lady was on there and I thought she was a nice looking actor”, Jim remembered. “They flashed this Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition. It was basically pornography on there”, Jim continued. “I don’t know how they can basically put that in the store where children can see it”, said Jim. “Speaking of children, too words: corporal punishment. They need to bring back corporate punishment”, said Jim, who caused our host to clap. “Spank that tail a little bit”, Jim continued after suggesting “a 35-year-old male” to do the punishment. “And I would volunteer if any school were to come in and [have me] as a designated spanker”, said the Uncle. “You better have a witness in regards you can only spank the boys”, said our next caller Dave. “You can go to jail for that, you know”, David said in reference to spanking young girls. While curious about the report from FOX News Radio, “Was that the one where they’re picking up the garbage for the people and the old lady”, Dave asked. “The news reporter and the anchor were just happy and joking about the prophylacting”, the Uncle finally explained. “Uncle Henry, going back to the gentleman a while back talking about corporate punishment, I’m afraid—I’m afraid that our [culture] is going one way”, said Dave. “They seem to scream at anything”, he said about objectors. “And our society doesn’t scream very often”, Dave continued. “Also, I’m disappointed that our president didn’t actually go to Oklahoma and just sent one of his condolences”, said Dave before leaving us. “Let’s talk to John”, said the Uncle. “Uncle Henry, I sit around and listen to this all on the news and the radio”, said John. “People get upset about things”, John noticed. “Let’s talk to Robert. Hello Robert”, said the Uncle. “I had to comment on talking about corporal punishment in schools”, said Robert. “When they took God out of school, that’s when all their problem started”, said Robert after listing other problems in public schools. “I don’t think that realization will ever be made”, the Uncle responded. “If they want to start prosecuting politicians for anything wrong they’ve been doing, they ought to move all the civilians out of Washington”, Robert suggested, along with the construction of a fence around the city. After the break for commercials and a ridiculous voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. I don’t know if there is—I don’t know if there a beverage or concoction for you to wipe out of your mind as a sober person”, said the Uncle, who was responding to the listener’s recorded message. “Let’s talk to Nick. Hello Nick”, he said to the next caller. “Hey, good morning out there. A beautiful day out here in the country”, said Nick. “The blankets I put on my Satsuma trees, because when it gets to 28, 29 degrees—“, said Nick. “Another thing that’s going to affect me is this whole scandal with the peanuts and we’ve grown a crop of peanuts”, said Nick. “They ought to go to jail for life”, Nick said about peanut manufacturers under investigation. “We’ve still got millions and millions out there with an initiative to work”, Nick believes. “All right, thank you very much for your phone call”, said the Uncle after Nick left us. “Yesterday, I had an audio tape about the ultra, ultra, liberal college professor that listens to the ‘podcast’ ”, said the Uncle. “And I have gotten a lot of response”, the Uncle continued. “Here’s an excerpt of what she had to say about the intellect about the president”, he said before playing the audio clip. After the audio clip ended, “All right, not drinking the Kool Aid, even though watching the (presidential) press conference twice and drinking the Kool Aid”, said the Uncle. “I have gotten dozens of responses for [that] mind-boggling voice mail”, said the Uncle before playing three negative and mean-spirited voice messages from listeners of the show. After playing those clips, “Well, as Fred Richardson would say, time will tell, time will tell, time holds all the answers we know and in time we’ll know”, said the Uncle. “I might have that one (quote) framed”, the Uncle suggested for himself. “There was a listener who did some listener reporting who went to Bienville Square where they had that strange PETA lady”, said the Uncle. “There was no nudity!” the Uncle quickly said as he directed listeners to images of the event held by the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) at the radio station’s World Wide Web page.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Rema. Hello Rema”, said the Uncle. “Hello there, Uncle Henry. How are you?” said Rema. “All of you better hold on to our history and hold on”, said Rema before ending her brief call. “Our youth reporter, our arts reporter Trey Lane. Trey Lane, are you in there?” said the Uncle as he summoned the show’s call screener with his theme music. “We have talked a lot about gardening this morning, strangely”, the Uncle reminded the call screener. “Did you ever garden?” the Uncle asked, “Did you grow anything?” “I have before. It’s been years now”, Trey answered. “Regular vegetables?” the Uncle asked. “Yes”, Trey answered. “It’s a very enjoyable, very relaxing thing to do”, said Trey. “I did some local stuff from random market [places]”, said Trey after our host asked where he gets his produce. “I don’t know if I can call them groupies”, the Uncle said about the call screener’s fan base. “They say that a Mobile person, once again a Mobile person is going to be on ‘Survivor’. I’m very nervous about this”, said the Uncle. “A 24-year-old cattle rancher from Mobile County”, the Uncle explained. “And you say, ‘Well Uncle Henry, why are you worried about this?’ ”, the Uncle presumed his listeners would ask before playing audio from the last time a person from Mobile was on the TV program “Survivor”. “All right, he then invented a ‘Survivor’ latrine”, said the Uncle after playing the audio. “I’m surprised they didn’t make a spin-off show with him”, said Trey. “We’re trying to attract more businesses”, said the Uncle. “I may tune in just to get an inkling of how Mobile will be represented if we’re going to get more of a guy saying he’ll brush his teeth”, the Uncle predicts. “Anybody who watches ‘Survivor’ anyway, please call in”, Trey suggested. “I like the way you said it”, the Uncle responded. “That’s what it is, it’s a game show”, our host described “Survivor”. “One of the reasons I don’ t like it is because rarely do old people do well on it”, the Uncle admitted. “Speaking of the old, there is something I want to share with you. This—there is a story that was sent to us by one of our engineering staff that in the state of California they have an agency where they deal with issues with old people”, said the Uncle. “It instructs the media what is correct and what is politically correct when dealing with old people”, the Uncle explained. “Elderly: use this word carefully”, the Uncle read directly from the stylebook from California. “Also to be avoided are senior citizen, golden year, spicy, spry, feeble, eccentric, senile, and grandmotherly, all those terms are considered offensive in the state of California”, the Uncle continued. “Eighty-nine years young or something is also considered” politically incorrect, said the Uncle. “And people there should not be called a patient, just a (nursing home) resident”, the Uncle continued. “Who’s going to write a news story and call someone a ‘hag’?” the Uncle asked. “So that’s where the media—the media knows how not to offend older adults”, the Uncle concluded “And I would like to be called spry. I would like to be called feisty. And I like the word geezer. The Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, music from the movie “The Magnificent Seven” was used as bumper music. “And I don’t appreciate the language in that”, said the Uncle in response to the listener’s recorded message. “Don’t ever imagine me in any type of situation, I’m not suppose to be in your imagination”, said the Uncle. “I am not giving you permission to use me in any imagining”, the Uncle continued. “You don’t have permission to use me in your mind with that person (college professor)”, the Uncle concluded. “One thing I wanted to mention to you is all the states in the United States are just in a panic of not having enough money to do what they want to do”, said the Uncle. “Massachusetts, Massachusetts, the home of the Boston Tea Party”, the Uncle began one news story. “It would be the highest in the nation if they do it. A twenty-seven cent tax increase in the state of Massachusetts, the home of the Boston Tea Party”, the Uncle explained. “There would be a tracking device in your vehicle inspecting sticker”, the Uncle continued. “And they would give you a bill based on how much you’ve drove”, said the Uncle. “Look for more of this and I predict we will have more toll rolls more than you can imagine”, said the Uncle. “Maybe that will help with the obesity problem in the United States where you are forced to walk”, said the Uncle, who also predicts “an inhaling tax”. “Let’s talk to William. Hello William”, he said to the next caller, who has advice for all of Mobile County and “really all the United States”. “Read George Orwell’s ‘1984’ where you talk about—what were you talking about? Traffic stickers, government stickers”, said William. After mentioning socialism, “And I’m going to be brief, why not, we can do [some of that] too”, said William. “Is there a cartoon of it (‘1984’)? Is there a movie of it?”, the Uncle asked Trey Lane at his work post, “They did, all right”. “If they can do a comic book of it”, the Uncle suggested. “And Trey Lane, do you know about this ‘1984’? Was there a major star in it?” said the Uncle. “It’s hard to get people to read something, they don’t have the attention span”, according to the Uncle. “Oh right, Richard Burton! Thank you for the suggestion”, said the Uncle after listening to the call screener. “Now if we can get a cartoon version of it, maybe the Muppets do a version of ‘1984’ ”, said the Uncle before the break. After the final break for today and an angry voice message, “Well, I—I don’t know—I don’t want to get out of jury duty and if I get someone to be on a jury, I will get you all of my new details as I am allowed by law”, said the Uncle, who was responding to the listener’s recorded message. “Coming up we have ‘Ask the Expert’. Heads Heating and Air. After that ‘The Rush Limbaugh Show’ here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle. “John, I don’t know if you heard the story or not, but the president did have a pre-selected list of reporters”, the Uncle told one listener and recent caller. “So you were way closer than you realized. A pre-selected list. Remember to pray, pray for others”, said the Uncle. “You’ve been listening to NewsRadio 710 WNTM, Mobile, Alabama. It’s 10 o’clock”, he said at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 5/10!

Notes of Interest

“Nice” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

This writer shall return on Monday. Good day!

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Got rain on the way. Sixty-nine degrees. All right, Bill, if you’re going to give me that kind of financial advice, where would I go?” said the Uncle, who was responding to a listener’s voice message. “Should I slip right over to Mexico? I don’t understand where I would go?” the Uncle asked. “It takes about 15 to 20 minutes to give me an e-mail”, the Uncle told listeners who might send comments during the show. “When I see it 15 to 30 minutes later, it doesn’t make any sense. And Bill, I don’t want to leave the United States. I like the United States. Let’s talk to John. Hello John”, said the Uncle. “Is this the same Bill from yesterday that said he’s against cigarettes? And he voted for Obama?” said John. “There was a request that instead of expressing disagreement—the word ‘balance’ was used”, said the Uncle. “Well is this still a free country is it?” John asked. “This is what our military people fight for, the right to freedom of speech”, said John. “Let’s talk to Chad. Hello Chad. Good morning”, said the Uncle. “I was calling in about the liberal professor’s comments. You answered one of my questions all ready”, said Chad. “You confirmed that she’s a political science professor all ready”, Chad continued. “Many of those professors are actually separated from the real world”, according to Chad. “They don’t actually get to get out and produce a product”, said Chad. “They are totally detached from the real world and I was fortunate enough and that’s because I decided to stay where I stay”, Chad continued. “I can’t believe—it’s hard to believe that people would call themselves educated would not see the clean facts”, said Chad. “I’ve known several professors that lived in the real world but the problem is you’re not suppose to disagree with [a] professor”, said the Uncle. “I very often wanted to speak up and say something, but I knew better”, said Chad. “You wanted to get good grades”, the Uncle presumed. “And this woman and others that think like her, because we don’t like this particular plan, we’re not like these liberals and democrats”, said Chad. “I mean look at today at the size of these Medicare and welfare programs”, Chad said for example. “She wants to bring up facts and you can’t argue with facts, she has to look up some facts”, said Chad. “Government spending will not [increase] the economy, tax cuts will”, Chad concluded before leaving us. “Let’s talk to George”, said the Uncle in an enthusiastic tone of voice before the frequent caller known for having machine gun sound effects in the background spoke. “I heard a statement that you’re not going to be around in two years”, said George. “In a nursing home or not even on this planet”, the Uncle predicts for himself in two years due to his age. “Be optimistic”, George suggested. “I think you’re going to be around in two years. I think you’re going to be around in ten years”, said George. “The Uncle Henry Show ten years from now, I will be the grouchiest host in the history of radio”, the Uncle predicts. “I think Mobile is a great place to build that tanker (airplane) and I see no reason to split that contract”, said George before leaving us. “I think he was—now I’m confused. (251) 479-2723 is the number as the Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials without explaining why he was “confused” by George’s call. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues. You know I’m glad you brought that up”, said the Uncle, who was responding to the previous recorded message. “They were selling these portable TVs down at the grocery store”, the Uncle remembered. “And I’m wondering if any of those are going to work at all when we go all digital?” the Uncle asked. “That’s a very good question. Let’s talk to Steve. Hello Steve”, said the Uncle. “Yeah, I’m—I’m listening to all this and I don’t even understand it. It all goes back eight years in the first [few] months of the Bush administration”, said Steve. “George Bush never had a moment’s rest of criticism from these people”, said Steve before telling “these people” to “grow up”. “I think George Bush just handled it”, according to Steve. “There will always be people who just don’t like the president no matter what”, said the Uncle. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed it, but everything’s seem quiet on the radio lately and I’ve given the man a chance”, said Steve, who was referring to the current president of the USA. “I don’t necessarily want the president to fail”, said Steve. “All they have to do is cut taxes across the board, just a [few] notches across the board”, said Steve. “Let’s go with something we know will work”, Steve continued. “That drives the economy through the roof every single time”, said Steve, who believes “these people” who say otherwise “are just whistling Dixie”. “Spending, spending, spending just makes [someone] poor”, said Steve. “I don’t know if there’s going to be anything we can do about it except vote in the next election”, according to Steve. “It looks like it’s a done deal”, said the Uncle in reference to a stimulus legislation in the Congress of the USA. “Whoever is in Washington will never dictate whether I’m successful or not”, said Steve. “I’m not going to listen to it everyday, I’m not going to be involved in it everyday”, Steve continued. “The people who are successful now are going to be successful at the end of it”, Steve predicts. “We’re not going to be waiting for someone filling our tanks with gasoline”, said Steve before leaving us. “Let’s talk to Don. Hello Don”, said the Uncle. “About the person contracting you out”, said Don. “I’ve been in the military and I’ve handled several acquisition proposals”, said Don. “It’s my opinion that this Airbus technology (for tanker airplanes) from two socialist countries—two socialist countries, really, France and England”, Don began. “Every bit of money goes to Americans, not France”, Don continued. “I think the man was right with contracting it out and I’m a Mobilian”, said Don before leaving us. “All right, Don, thank you for the phone call”, said the Uncle. “One caller (Don) wants to see Boeing get the contract instead of Northrop-Grumman”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. (251) 479-2723 is the number. It is a secret about that movie (from the show’s call screener Trey Lane) that I will not reveal. I may reveal it after the film scramble has been judged, but there is a secret of the film that I will have to reveal”, said the Uncle in response to a listener’s voice message before summoning the call screener with his theme music. “Trey Lane, you have typed to me that is the single most shocking thing I’ve read in several months”, said the Uncle. “You watched the Mobile city council meeting on Comcast (Port City 6)”, the Uncle revealed. “After that (Port City Café) is a new show that I’ve been working on, it’s about arts and culture”, said Trey, who did not identify the program by its title “Mix Tape”. “Why didn’t you tell us? We could have promoted it!” said the Uncle. “Were you in it?” he asked the call screener, who did not appear on “Mix Tape”. “So you watched it (the city council meeting) because it was on after?” the Uncle has learned. “It was actually more fascinating that the show I worked on”, said Trey. “The atmosphere in that room , it was fascinating”, Trey continued. “Now I’m fascinated because you’re fascinated”, said the Uncle. “I’m going to watch it like people watch ‘Lost’ ”, said Trey, who caused our host to clap slowly. “Excellent”, the Uncle responded. “The last two years of the Outlaw administration and the first two years of the Dow administration, I was there”, said the Uncle, who said “it was like a chore” attending the Mobile city council meetings every week. “All right are you comfortable saying who you like?” the Uncle asked, “You better say who you like”. “There were two gentleman who didn’t rub me the right way”, said Trey, who could not member the two councilmen. “I don’t have Comcast”, the Uncle explained why he can’t see the city council meetings. “One of the cable systems in Baldwin County records the commission meetings and they show it 24 hours a day”, said the Uncle. “And you compared it to watching the TV show ‘Lost’ ”, said the Uncle before playing different bumper music. “Now here is someone who wants to be on the city council, Ron Wallace”, said the Uncle before the next caller spoke. “Like I said, I want people in this district and particularly in Mobile to look at it (‘the agenda for change’)”, Ron reminded listeners. “Maybe there is an attorney to take up your case and restore your civil rights so you can speak before the city council”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Billy. Hello Billy. Good morning”, he said to the next caller. “Hello, is this Uncle Henry?” Billy asked. “Well, I live in the woods out west in Mobile County and I’ve been listening to [you] all this time”, said Billy. “As you realize, I’ve had all this time”, said Billy after remembering the Great Depression. “Just this morning I heard again on the FOX News somewhere on 710 that someone in Washington wants to appoint someone to prosecute everyone in the Bush administration”, said Billy. “I’m a just a wondering where we’re heading for?” Billy asked. “Billy, thank you for listening for so long. I hate to cut you so early, but I have to take this”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Therese. Hello Therese”, said the Uncle. “What is stopping the administration from looking at [your] 401(k) plans”, Therese asked. “I thought imminent domain was about actual land”, said the Uncle. “The problem is that America is turning away from the Ten Commandments”, said Therese. “Do you know that a pig can’t look up”, Therese asked in reference to Scripture. “All right, what does that mean?” the Uncle asked. “The low life, pigs are low life”, Therese explained. “And a pig can’t look up until they’re on their backs and a lot of people are going to lie on their backs”, Therese continued. “Politicians that need to look at biblical principles because that’s the only way out of this mess”, Therese concluded before leaving us. “Trey Lane, have you ever heard anything about the pig”, the Uncle asked the call screener in reference to Therese’s call. “Very unusual. I’m going to have to analyze that [phone] call”, said the Uncle before speaking to caller Tim, who is also known as Sam Marston IV. “I had some pigs in the past, but I never heard of that. I had a pot belly pig”, said Tim. “You did!” the Uncle responded. “You will see people on the Mardi Gras floats using your tax money for throws”, said Tim. “Have you ever been to the RSA Tower?” Tim asked our host. “I want to tell you as a PSA that you better go early, you better have your ID”, said Tim. “Anybody that is going that way, you better go that way and give them your birth certificate”, said Tim before leaving us. “Starting with Trey Lane’s shocking revelation and then Ron Wallace and Therese and Tim, just shocking revelations that I need think about”, said the Uncle before the break. After the final break for today and an unexpected and unexplained audio clip from a presidential event, “The Uncle Henry Show concluding with ‘Ask the Expert’ coming up after the news with veterinarian advice from Irby Overton. Remember to pray, pray for others and when in doubt of what to do you will find all the answers within the pages of your Bible”, said the Uncle at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 7/10!

“T’storms Today” – TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Today’s Show




We start off today’s show with…


“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710 on this lovely, cloudy day”, said the Uncle after playing a loud and angry voice message from a listener. “I all ready received some wonderful, wonderful e-mails this morning from K. P., from Keith, from Ellen”, said the Uncle after reminding listeners how to contact him by telephone and electronic mail. “Also let me say this at the outset of this hour. I haven’t had the chance to chastise Trey Lane as I have done previous call screeners”, said the Uncle, who was referring to his former regular call screener Leeanna Matteson and substitutes such as Jessica and Jennifer. “He is not to have a separate show of your own, the two of you”, the Uncle advised Trey Lane and the caller on hold. “If they feel that they should only explain their opinion to Trey Lane, then that’s all it is”, the Uncle explained this “separate show”. “If you want to make contact with him, you can go on to MySpace, Facebook, YouTube”, the Uncle suggested. “Don’t use this show to have some type of conversational party with Trey Lane. You’re tying up the line. There are a lot of disoriented elderly in Mobile who want to talk”, said the Uncle. “Again, Trey Lane, don’t take this as a criticism of you. I know you can’t help [that] you’re—you’re charismatic with some people”, he said before speaking to this hour’s first caller. “You know I can’t help but laugh at Bill. He’s surprised by Obama’s act?” said Larry, who was referring to a caller from the previous hour of the show. “I think we all better get ready for some surprises. How many of us have read the generational theft (stimulus) bill?” said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Ron. Hello Ron. Good morning”, he said to the next caller. “One of the reporters he called up was from the Huffington Post”, Ron noticed about the president of the USA during last night’s news conference from the White House. “That’s part of his agenda”, according to Ron. “That is very interesting. That’s probably the first blog that has ever been at a press conference”, said the Uncle. “They have also been a major contributor to his campaign also”, Ron said about the weblog’s creators before leaving us. “See what you missed”, the Uncle told his audience. “If you watched the ‘Barama’ in his speech”, said our next caller, who made a common mispronunciation of the president’s name. “He reminds me of some science fiction-type movie”, according to the caller before odd music began to play later in his call. “All right, thank you very much for your phone call. President from another planet. Before I get back to the phones, there is something that I must bring to your attention that I didn’t know about”, said the Uncle. “There is a story out from Bloomberg that talks about what’s in the stimulus plan about health”, he said before reading the news article. “Let’s talk to Frank. Hello Frank. Good morning”, said the Uncle. “I don’t mean to sound like some nutcase, but I tell you what we are in big trouble and I’m glad to tell you that a number of your listeners understand that, that they are mad as hell”, said Frank. “I tried many times to talk to people about how insane all this is. It’s not insane. These people are geniuses, they know what they are doing”, said Frank, all though he admitted, “I don’t know much about government” to understand the Congress of the USA. “I’m going to give you my phone number off line and I don’t know what you can do, if assisted by law”, said Frank. “Please call me, we need to have an assembly, put our heads together so we can stop this thing”, said Frank. “One of the guys called in to say give the guy a chance”, said Frank, who did not specify these “guys”. “I beg Reggie Copeland to do a timeline study on this mortgage [crisis]”, said Frank, who was referring to a member of the Mobile city council. “George Wallace was right, there is not a dime’s worth of difference. They are all of bunch of jerks”, Frank concluded before leaving us. “Let’s see, I accidentally disconnected you. You can call back in”, said the Uncle. “Once again, I am forced to quote Fred Richardson on this”, said the Uncle before playing a recording of the Mobile city council member he mentioned. “Uncle Henry Show continues”, the Uncle reminded listeners before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Anna. Hello Anna”, said the Uncle. “Good morning, Uncle Henry, again. You see, we better watch out”, said Anna. “If we have anything that’s really, really bad with our health and this bill that is in this (stimulus plan) supposedly”, Anna continued. “If we have anything that is wrong with us, [if] we’re too old, we’re going to be put in the back burner”, according to Anna. “And that’s what’s in that bill”, Anna believes. “That is exactly what he ran on and he’s campaigning for that [stimulus plan] right now”, said Anna. “In this first stimulus bill, two million dollars from the Bank of America went to ACORN”, according to Anna. “Some of the people, Uncle Henry, don’t realize from Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid are”, Anna claimed about two congressmen. “What is your proof (of the previous president entering every home in America, metaphorically speaking), I don’t have to have anything. NBC says anything”, said Anna, who claimed an unidentified person said, “I don’t have to. I don’t have to”. “It’s exactly what he’s campaigning on that the people voted on”, said Anna before saying the president’s full name. “It just hurts my heart, Uncle Henry”, said Anna. “Hang in there, Anna”, said the Uncle. “Let’s talk to Brent. Hello Brent”, he said to the next caller. “I am the Mardi Gras artist”, said Brent. “The reason I’m calling you is this Saturday I’m going to give a demonstration at the Mobile Museum of Art about Mardi Gras”, said Brent. “I would like to have permission to use your likeness”, Brent requested from our host. “As long as you don’t use me in some sort of sexual light or using drugs”, said the Uncle before Brent defended the event as something “family friendly”. “I would be glad for you to use my likeness in your artwork”, said the Uncle. “I just wanted your permission to use your face”, said Brent before leaving us. “I am flattered of you to use my likeness for the children. Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for news, commercials, and station promotions.

“Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710”, said the Uncle before responding to a listener’s voice message. “Let’s talk to ‘Top Cat’. Hello ‘Top Cat’ ”, he said to the next caller. “Hello, how’s everything going?” said “Top Cat”. “I called in to talk about animals, but that lady said a lot about politics”, said “Top Cat”. “The earlier caller, he was talking about or someone was talking about animals”, “Top Cat” remembers. “Yes possums, they live in the drains in the City of Mobile”, said the Uncle. “That’s right, I like possums”, “Top Cat” responded. “I see raccoons around this building on more than one occasion. I mean we’re outside of the mall”, said the Uncle. On a different subject, “That’s life in Mobile”, said the Uncle before mentioning smoking. After “Top Cat” left us, “By the way, I want to thank you for smoking, for supporting all the various social programs in this country with your smoking”, said the Uncle before thanking the show’s call screener Trey Lane “and all the tobacco addicts in this country”. “What does it take to make a politician honorable?” said our next caller Tim, also known as Sam Marston IV. “I guess they do it themselves”, the Uncle answered. “They don’t have the garbage cans with the city council advertisement on them. Do you remember those garbage cans?” said Tim. “They just have the plain old garbage cans”, Tim continued. “These garbage cans have no lids. You can just ring them like a basketball goal”, according to Tim. “How in the world—are they going to build a bridge to this park?” Tim asked about the proposed Unity Park in Mobile. “The new park is not meant for us to go to”, the Uncle responded. “That thing (the park) during Mardi Gras, it’s going to have people in it”, Tim predicts. “It’s going to cause traffic problems, people are going to—“, said Tim before changing the subject in the middle of his sentence. “The Uncle Henry Show continues”, said the Uncle before the break for commercials. After the break and a voice message, “Uncle Henry Show continues here on NewsRadio 710. Let’s talk to Franklin. Hello Franklin”, said the Uncle. “Good morning, Uncle Henry. Roll Tide Roll!” said Franklin, who admitted he did not know whether previous callers discussed last night’s news conference from the White House or not. “Whenever the president of the United States told a nationally televised audience that only the government can solve a problem”, said Franklin, who said “that put a chill up my spine and that I was right (about the president)”. “In favor of the government controlling everything and I think that this is scary, Henry”, Franklin explained. “Anyhow, for Tim being worried about the park. Tim, don’t worry, that park is being built for supporters of Mr. Jones and Barack Obama supporters”, according to Franklin. “I don’t know if anybody will go there if there are no benches”, said the Uncle. “I get the feeling, Franklin, that it’s just there as decoration. That it’s a nice way to spend $684,000, plus a hundred thousand dollars for the statues”, the Uncle continued. “Let’s talk to John, one of our many Johns today”, said the Uncle. “Did anyone mention the PETA protest that’s going on in downtown today?” John asked. “No”, the Uncle answered. “I’m sure most of your callers are meat eaters”, said John before encouraging listeners to have “an anti-protest against these folks” by bringing hamburgers and “cooking up some Hall’s Meats”. “I mean it’s the cows putting out the methane gas, not the people”, said John, who claimed this is the purpose of the PETA protest. “One or two of the female protestors are going to be in the nude”, according to John. “Anyway, it’s suppose to happen this afternoon at 1:00”, John reminded listeners. “Get a sack of Krystals or McDonald’s”, John suggested before leaving us. “This sounds like right down Trey Lane’s ally”, said the Uncle before summoning the call screener with his theme music. “Do you eat meat?” the Uncle asked Trey. “I do, I’ve been a vegetarian before”, said Trey, who did not eat meat for 10 years. “How much meat do you eat? Do you eat meat everyday?” the Uncle asked. “Were you concerned about the feelings and the souls of the cows?” the Uncle asked Trey, who was not concerned. “Did you spend time with naked PETA people?” the Uncle asked. “No, not PETA people”, Trey answered. “I’m thinking they get you down there with the naked lady to get you to know the case”, said Trey before comparing the event to Christians and “a street preacher”, as our host put it. “It sounds like they are taking that message to that level”, according to Trey. “Did you stay the same size when you were a vegetarian”, the Uncle asked. “I gained a little bit of weight as a vegetarian”, Trey responded. As the call screener returned to his work post, “A failed vegetarian”, the Uncle called Trey Lane before the break for commercials. After the final break for today, “The Uncle Henry Show concluding now. Thank you so much for listening. We have ‘Ask the Expert’ coming up next”, said the Uncle. “Remember to pray, pray for others and when you’re in doubt of what to do, you will find all the answers within the pages of your Bible”, he reminded listeners at the end of the show.

Today’s 9 o’clock hour gets a 3/10!


“A Few Showers” - TV5 meteorologist John Nodar

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